Am I An Egotist?

Ever feel certain you know yourself, then boom—something happens that flips the script? That's exactly what occurred when I realised I'm not as ego-driven as I'd always believed. In today's podcast, I talk about the surprising shift that woke me up and how it might resonate with you.

The episode explores how we often label ourselves in ways that don’t match our deeper motivations. I dive into how this misunderstanding happens, why it matters, and what you can do if you've been putting too much weight on ego. Get ready for practical insights, a bit of humour, and a good dose of self-reflection.

My Surprising Realisation

I used to think ego was at the centre of all my decisions. For ages, I was convinced that my drive for success came from a place of “I deserve this” or “I need to stand out.” Then I had a moment that made me pause.

“I thought I was chasing high achievement for recognition. Turned out, I just wanted to prove a point to myself.”

That tiny change in perspective tore down years of assumptions. I realised my motivation was more about seeking validation from within, rather than chasing applause from others. I also noticed how often we get stuck in old thinking patterns because they feel safe and familiar.

Where Ego Gets Confusing

We tend to blame a lot on ego. It's easy to say, “Oh, that's just my ego talking.” But is it always that simple?

Sometimes, we label different emotions or fears as ego because it's convenient. If you're juggling ADHD or dyslexia, there's already enough internal chatter. Adding a layer of blame on top can create even more confusion.

Here's the key: the voice that sounds like ego might be a mask for deeper insecurities. Maybe it's fear of being overlooked or a desire for connection. When you recognise that, it changes how you see your actions.

Cracks in the Armour

If you suspect you're wearing an ego mask, there are a few tell-tale signs to look out for:

• You feel defensive when people question your choices.
• There's a nagging thought that you're not enough, no matter how much you do.
• Compliments make you uncomfortable because you don't believe them.
• You oscillate between craving attention and wanting to hide.

These signs don't mean you're arrogant. They may just show you haven't addressed the real reasons behind your drive. It's like wearing a coat that's two sizes too big—uncomfortable and not quite right.

Digging Deeper for Motivation

When I gave myself permission to go beyond ego, I discovered a simple truth: I really just wanted to feel capable. My inner voice, the one I mixed up with ego, was telling me I had something to prove to me rather than to the world.

You might find a similar thread in your own life. Whether you're climbing the career ladder, testing a new business idea, or learning a skill, pause and ask: “Am I doing this to impress others, or am I trying to fulfil a personal calling?”

Being honest with yourself is tough at first. Once you see your true motivations, you'll approach goals with more authenticity. Your mind feels lighter, and it's easier to share your unique talents without second-guessing.

Practical Steps to Rewire Your Mindset

So how do you shift from “ego-driven” to “internally inspired”? Here are a few strategies that helped me:

• Journal briefly each morning: A few lines on how you feel and what you're aiming for can reveal hidden dynamics.
• Pause when you sense resistance: If you feel defensive or uneasy, ask yourself why. You might uncover an inner fear instead of an ego trip.
• Share your thoughts with a friend: Verbalising can help you see what’s pushing you. Sometimes a different perspective highlights what's really going on.
• Get curious about doubts: Curiosity tames judgement. Instead of blaming ego, explore if you're needing reassurance or looking for acceptance.

Small steps lead to big shifts in understanding who you are at your core. It's not always easy, but it's worth the effort.

Here are some quick takeaways you’ll find in this episode:

• Recognising the difference between ego and deeper fears.
• Identifying unhelpful patterns that disguise your real motivations.
• Practical ways to refocus on what truly drives you.
• Why a simple shift in perspective can free you from self-doubt.

If you're up for a deeper dive, don't miss the full conversation. The player's right at the top of this page, ready whenever you are. Find out if your ego is actually the culprit or if there's something bigger behind your drive.

Click play, have a listen, and get ready to rethink what really makes you tick.