Authentic Vs Inauthentic

Have you ever had that uneasy feeling that you're putting on a show, hiding behind a mask, or constantly adapting who you are? Many of us with dyslexia and other neurodiverse ways of thinking know exactly what that feels like. It's like being a chameleon, blending in wherever we go, often at the expense of our own comfort.

In this episode, we explore the fine line between self-preservation and self-betrayal. If you’ve been struggling with being “too flexible” or feeling guilty about not showing your true self, you’re not alone. We delve into why we do this, how it shapes our relationships, and ways we can embrace who we really are.

The Mask We Wear

Wearing a mask can feel like a form of self-protection. We don’t want to be judged or treated differently for how our minds work. Sometimes we just want to keep things simple, so we learn to mirror social cues and fit in.

One of the insights from the podcast was how normal it can feel to be in disguise. It's not always deliberate. We often do it without realising, especially if we've spent our childhood or teens feeling pressured to be “normal.”

“Have you ever felt like you're wearing a mask? Being a chameleon? Riding that thin grey line?”

Why We Do It

There are many reasons we fall into chameleon mode. We crave acceptance and understanding, yet fear rejection. We also want to protect our energy, because explaining how our minds work can be exhausting.

Sometimes we’re just trying to be kind, not wanting to ruffle feathers or stand out too much. We'd rather blend in at a gathering than become the topic of conversation about “why do you do that?” or “how come you missed that detail?”

• Anxiety about being judged
• Desire to avoid conflict
• Habit of code-switching to fit in
• Lack of safe spaces to be open

The Impact on Our Lives

The problem comes when the mask and the persona take over. We can lose our sense of who we are, which ramps up stress and drains our emotional resources. If we’ve been hiding for a long time, it might even affect our relationships.

It also stops us from finding those deeper connections where we can truly be ourselves. We might feel disappointed when people don’t understand us, but it's hard for them to see our real selves if we keep them hidden.

Breaking the Habit

Lifting your mask doesn't mean you have to reveal every thought. It’s more about recognising the chameleon tendencies and asking why you’re doing it. Is it fear, habit, or a genuine desire to keep the peace?

Try small steps. Be open about your experiences with people you trust. You don't have to share your whole dyslexia story, but it can relieve a load to let someone in on what’s actually happening in your head. You’d be surprised how many folks actually appreciate authenticity.

1. Notice the urge to blend in
2. Slowly share your real opinions
3. Practice self-acceptance
4. Seek out supportive communities

Embracing Our Differences

One of the biggest shifts is realising that being different is an asset, not a flaw. When we stop trying to look like everyone else, we can focus on what we do well and how to use it.

Imagine waking up each day excited to share your ideas without worrying if they’re too “out there.” That’s the kind of liberation that happens when you no longer carry the burden of trying to conform. Embracing our differences is a key to living a more vibrant, contented life.

• We gain freedom to express ourselves
• We reduce stress and mental exhaustion
• We build more honest relationships
• We discover strengths we never knew we had

Key Takeaways

• Masking isn’t always intentional but can become a lifelong habit
• We often hide to avoid judgement or conflict
• Long-term masking creates stress and disconnect
• Authenticity leads to deeper connections and self-trust

If this sounds familiar, you're in the right place. The full episode is just a click away at the player above. Tune in to hear more practical tips and stories about channelling our neurodiverse strengths and letting our true selves shine.