Changing A Habit With Tong Lin

Have you ever felt the urge to break a habit but held back because the idea of change seems a bit scary? We often think the best way forward is to shirk the discomfort, yet this podcast episode invites us to sit with pain instead. It may sound counterintuitive, but there's something powerful about leaning into the discomfort that follows us when we're trying to alter our behaviour.

In this episode, we explore how slowing down and acknowledging uncomfortable moments can pave the way to real change. You’ll hear about a simple mindset shift that helps you spot when you’re on autopilot and a handy tool especially helpful for Dyslexics who sometimes wrestle with swirling thoughts. If you're trying to break a habit—large or small—this conversation offers practical insights you can put into action today.

Why Sitting With Pain Matters

It might seem odd to tell someone to sit with pain. We live in a world that promotes quick fixes. Many of us leap from one distraction to another, trying to squash any discomfort that creeps in. Yet what if that persistent feeling is exactly the key to unlocking the habit change you need?

When we let ourselves fully experience discomfort, we notice what sparks our unwanted behaviours. Maybe it’s a sense of boredom, or a flare of frustration. Instead of pushing it away, we observe it. This simple act of noticing helps us recognise what the pain is shouting about in our minds, which helps us direct our energy more wisely.

There's science behind it too. Our brains strive to avoid pain, so they create shortcuts, also known as habits. Pinpointing what triggers those shortcuts can help us break away from the cycle. It’s a bit like finding the hidden switch. Once you see it, you finally know how to turn certain responses off or on.

A Surprising Mindset Shift

One of the real eye-openers from this conversation is that pain isn’t the enemy, it’s a signal. We learn that the very act of leaning into discomfort can reveal fresh perspectives on how we act. You stop being a victim of unhelpful impulses and become the person in charge.

"Sometimes the biggest challenge is just sitting with the inner conflict for a little longer than feels comfortable."

This quote stuck with me because it sums up the process perfectly. We usually want to move on or distract ourselves. Yet in doing so, we miss the message our bodies and brains are trying to send. That extra moment spent staying present can lead to a real breakthrough.

My Personal Experience

I used to bail out whenever discomfort surfaced. If I felt anxious about a new project, I'd reach for my phone and scroll aimlessly. Later, I’d wonder why my to-do list never shrank. I knew my time was going somewhere I didn’t want it to, yet I couldn't figure out how to stop repeating the same pattern.

Everything shifted when I tried the tactic shared in this episode. Instead of picking up my phone, I paused. I felt my frustration building, but I decided to observe it. I noticed the tightness in my chest, the restless tapping of my foot. At first, it was tough. But by letting myself experience it, I discovered the deeper reason behind my anxiety: fear of doing something imperfectly.

That small moment of awareness showed me that my habit of distraction happened whenever I felt I might fail. The next time that feeling popped up, I was ready. No more instant scramble for safety. I gave myself a second to feel, and in that second, the habit lost some of its power.

Building a Habit-Help Toolkit

Breaking habits requires more than good intentions. It helps to have a simple, repeatable approach. Here’s a quick rundown of a habit-help toolkit that Dyslexics might find especially useful. It keeps things simple so you don’t get lost in over-complication:

• Name the Feeling: Acknowledge if it's anxiety, boredom or frustration. Identifying it often reduces its intensity.
• Pause and Breathe: Take three calm breaths. This creates space between you and the impulse.
• Observe Body Signals: Pay attention to any tension or restlessness. Briefly focusing on this can help it release.
• Choose a Response: Ask, “What do I really need right now?” Listen for a practical next step, not just an escape.

These steps don’t require loads of time. If you find a step feels too big, scale it back. The goal is to stay present. Even 20 seconds of mindful observation can make an impact.

A Great Tool for Dyslexics

The episode highlights how Dyslexics often have racing thoughts or might get stuck in looped patterns. Sitting with pain can be tough, because there’s always a temptation to sidestep that discomfort with a whirlwind of fresh ideas or distractions.

Yet that rapid-fire thinking also carries an advantage. Once you pick up on a thought or emotion, you can redirect that energy in a more constructive way. It’s about using your strengths—like creativity and adaptability—to notice the signs of discomfort and explore them before they take over.

You could even keep a small notebook or digital memo. Jot down what you’re feeling, then brainstorm a quick action that’d help you move forward. This helps keep your Dyslexic mind engaged without letting it escape from the actual issue.

Making It Part of Your Day

Practice is key. If you try these techniques just once a week, you may forget them the next time you really need them. Consider weaving them into daily life, even when things are going well.

It might help to set a reminder on your phone, something that pings you to pause and check in with your body and mind. Or link these techniques to a routine you already have, like waiting for the kettle to boil. The more natural you make it, the more likely you’ll be ready to face discomfort when it flares up.

In time, you’ll notice that the initial wave of discomfort can become more like a gentle signal, rather than a tsunami that knocks you off your feet. It’s a skill that grows with use.

Top Takeaways

• Discomfort isn’t the enemy—it’s often a clue to what’s holding you back.
• Pausing and breathing can create enough space to spot unhelpful habits.
• Naming emotions reduces their grip on your mind.
• Dyslexics can use their natural creativity to redirect racing thoughts.
• Consistency transforms a simple technique into a life-changing habit.

If you’re curious to learn more, tune in to the full episode. It goes deeper into the why and how of sitting with pain when a habit is on the line. You’ll hear personal stories, plus extra tools you can apply today. Enjoy the process, and remember: change doesn’t have to be a battle. Sometimes, it’s all about pausing long enough to see things clearly, then choosing your next step.