Progress Vs Perfection

Do you ever look at your work and think it’s just not good enough? That nagging sense of dissatisfaction can creep in fast. In this episode, we explore where that voice comes from and why it’s especially common among dyslexics. You’ll discover practical tips for navigating that critical inner monologue and how to communicate more effectively with others.

One big takeaway is the realisation that many dyslexics see so many details—both good and bad—that it can sometimes tip into over-criticising. In this podcast, we chat about where this mindset originates and how to rein it in. We also explore techniques to stay constructive instead of frustrated.

The Overcritical Mind

Many dyslexics have a well-trained eye for detail, even if they don’t think of themselves that way. They might notice flaws that others completely miss. But spotting every little issue can feel overwhelming, especially if you can see mistakes in your own work and everyone else’s.

This overcritical mindset leads to questions like, “Why even start if it’s bound to end up flawed?” That frustration can grow into a hard block to creativity. Sometimes, it spills over into how we talk to others. They might hear it as negativity, though it feels logical in our own heads.

“It’s not good enough. Why did I even start? Everything is wrong. I can see every fault in everything—why do you get angry when I tell you that?”

This quote from the podcast sums up the internal struggle. Feeling like you must point out errors can be hardwired into how you see the world. It’s not about being unkind; it’s about wanting to improve. Yet, it can drive friends, family and colleagues up the wall.

Why Dyslexia Magnifies It

Dyslexia often means our brains can process information in less linear ways. That’s not a bad thing. It’s a unique skill set that can pick up patterns, spot problems and make intuitive leaps. The trouble is, when self-criticism goes unchecked, it morphs into despair and can shut down motivation.

Here’s why it can feel so intense:

• High sensitivity: Emotional oversensitivity can amplify perceived faults.
• Detail awareness: Picking up every tiny error can be exhausting.
• Black-and-white thinking: Seeing something as perfect or flawed, with little in between.
• Comparison spiral: Feeling you must match or surpass others in every aspect.

Once we recognise what’s happening, we can start to shift our mindset. By accepting that mistakes are part of the process (and not the end of the world), we ease that crushing sense of failure.

Breaking the Pattern

Breaking out of the overcritical spiral is easier said than done, but it’s entirely doable. Listening to the podcast, you’ll hear strategies that have really helped me and many others. Here are a few highlights:

1. Pause Before Criticising: Take a breath and ask yourself, “Is this helpful to say? Do I need to mention it right now?” A moment of calm can save a lot of tension.
2. Shift to Curiosity: Instead of “Someone messed up,” think, “What can I learn from this?” It’s less combative and more open.
3. Set Boundaries: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s okay to step back. Tell people, “I need a moment to think,” so you’re not reacting from stress.
4. Celebrate Wins: Let the positives have the spotlight too. A quick, “Great job on that,” can balance out the negative feedback.

Sometimes, it’s about trial, error and a little perseverance. If you’d like more support, you can check out The Confident Dyslexic Course, which starts 22 February. It offers a more in-depth dive into topics like managing self-talk, building confidence and learning to communicate more kindly.

Communicating with Others

When you see faults everywhere, people can take it as constant criticism. Ever told a friend they spelled something wrong on their post, and they got upset? It’s not that you’re trying to be mean. But others might not appreciate “honest feedback” the way you intend.

Here’s how to keep relationships smooth:

• Use Positive Lead-Ins: Start with something you appreciate, then gently mention the concern.
• Pick Your Battles: Not every minute detail is worth bringing up.
• Ask Consent: “Would you like a suggestion?” can go a long way in shifting the energy of the conversation.

Miscommunication can be a huge energy drain. If you’d like to get better at organising tasks to reduce stress, take a look at the Get Your ToDo Lists Working in 2022 course. A clearer to-do system helps turn that critical eye into purposeful action.

Lastly, if you want to share your personal dyslexia story, you can be on the podcast yourself. Head over to this link to submit your story—it’s a great chance to inspire others.

Key Takeaways

• Overcritical thoughts often stem from heightened awareness of details.
• Recognising when you slide into extreme perfectionism can help stop negative spirals.
• Simple shifts, like pausing before speaking, can prevent harsh feedback from hurting others.
• Clear communication strategies—like asking for consent to give feedback—build stronger relationships.
• Support and resources can make a huge difference, so don’t be afraid to reach out.

Ready to learn more? Tune in to the full episode above. You’ll gain deeper insights on how to handle that inner critic and make constructive changes. Listening to the podcast is a great first step in discovering new ways to connect with others and embrace your dyslexic strengths.